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Wednesday 25 May 2011

The Black Stars World Cup team’s obsession with dates of birth and their characters on and off the field...


1.         Daniel ‘Damba” Adjei (10 Nov 1989)

A world cup gold medalist at the U-20 level, he needs to bide his time before taking over from “Olele”…Needs to work harder in order to stay in the Black Stars team…

2.         Hans Adu Sarpei ( 28 Jun 1976)

He often behaves like a “green horn” on the pitch even though he’s 35. A typical “standing 3”, Sarpei hardly overlaps. My question to Sarpei; Why did you buy a $2000 dog for Delay? Ah Sarpei paaa…

3.         Asamoah “Baby Jet” Gyan (22 Nov 1985)

The ladies man they call him, Asamoah will not concentrate on his football but ask what the ladies are saying about him, no wonder Ghanaians are yet to forgive him for that penalty miskick at the world cup. He’s however scored 25 goals in 47 matches for the Stars. You wonder if he’s a musician or a footballer as the “big ass” man is fond of dancing anytime he scores, a nuisance to many though…”ba ko no nooooooo”…

4.         John “Agya Koo” Paintsil ( 15 Jun 1981)

The “busy body” man hardly scores a goal but woe betides anyone who dares score a goal in his team, and the “Agya Koo” look-alike will celebrate more than the scorer. The flag hoisting is on after games…so watch out…

5.         John “Punk Man” Mensah (29 Nov 1982)

“Tabitha Kum, “Punk Man”, “Rock of Gibraltar” are some of his names. He always look pale as if he’s been `”arrested” by the Obuasi harmattan. The 40 something year old skipper of the Black Stars who says he’s 28 is gradually nearing his prime and so must back up…

6.         Anthony “Pablo” Annan ( 21 Jul 1986)

He might look tiny but big in age and bones, if he’s not squeezing his opponents testicles then he’s fingering an opponents eye. “Pablo” must stop the dirty tactics and play the good football he knows…



7.         Samuel “Eboue” Inkoom (1 Jun 1989)

Inkoom will go back and push his buttocks sideways before he’ll play a simple ball, masa why? He can challenge Asamoah Gyan for buttocks football…His surging runs on any good day will result in a goal…

8.         Jonathan Mensah (13 Jul 1990)

Even though he’s an exciting chap, he looks too over confident on the ball which might cost us some day if not checked…He really has a future…

9.         Derek Boateng (2 May 1983)

Derek is a nice guy apart from his scary dreadlocks, in fact it doesn’t fit him at all. He needs more playing time.

10.    Stephen “Tornado” Appiah (24 Dec 1980)

“Al Capitano” they call him, his football has deserted him in a rather whirlwind fashion…Arguably the most successful captain Ghana has ever had…Stephen has paid his dues to Ghana football…but the “goatee” beard must go since it scares toddlers…Step App…

11.    Sulley Muntari (27 Aug 1984)

A no-nonsense player who’ll pay anyone back with a “crazy” tackle anytime…He’s obviously lost form but his shots on goal are some few positives about him…needs to check his temperament…I learnt its only his wife (Menaye Donkor) who can control an angry Sulley…hmmm…


12.Prince Tagoe (9 Nov 1986)

He’ll miss 30 chances and score just one, do you know why? Because he often runs leaving the ball behind just like Kwame Ayew…Prince of Ohhh!!!

13.Andre “Dede” Ayew (17 Dec 1989)

Likes dribbling when he’s supposed to release the ball and clapping too much…does he attend Pentecost? Great chap with a great future…

14.Matthew Amoah (24 Oct 1980)

The “headmaster” they call him, are you surprised he’s still 30 years? He’s of course slow but sure…

15.Isaac Vorsah (21 Jun 1988)

He’s gradually warming himself into the mould of Sammy Kuffour but must work extra hard. The TSG Hoffenheim hard man’s unpardonable mistakes must stop now…

16.Stephen Ahorlu (5 Sept 1988)

I doubt if the former Heart of Lions goalkeeper has a future with the Black Stars after he made his debut against Argentina on October 1, 2009 because he is consistently inconsistent…its terribly costing his team Hapoel Ashkelon in Israel.

17.Rahim Ayew (16 Apr 1988)

What was this chap doing at the world cup? I still can’t understand how Rahim made it to South Africa 2010…may be its because he’s Abedi Pele’s son otherwise Laryea Kingston would have been a better option.

18.Dominic Adiyiah (29 Nov 1989)

“Soldier”, as he’s affectionately called took the world by storm in the U-20 world cup in 2009 but has since sunk into oblivion. He would however had scored what could have been a crucial goal to take the first African side to the semi-finals of the world cup but for a homo sapien called Luis Suarez…His peacock hairstyle fits him more…lol

19.Lee Addy (26 Sep 1985)

This guy seems to lose concentration often more than one would expect and laughs on top…ironical…He laughs when he commits terrible mistakes…he must be flogged!!! Someone tell Lee to be serious in serious games, period!!!

20.Quincy Owusu-Abeyie (15 Apr 1986)

He dribbles himself a lot, there’s absolutely no need for those unnecessary antics, even Ronaldinho has stopped. Instead of passing the ball around, you find Quincy dribbling himself…hahahaaaa…

21.Kwadwo Asamoah (9 Dec 1988)

He’s always eclipsed in big matches…but give him Mali and he’ll score two goals right now…Kwadwo must back up because more is expected of him…

22.Richard “Olele” Kingston (13 Jun 1978)

Arguably the luckiest goalkeeper since the inception of football in Ghana. Not even the legendary Robert Mensah had his luck. “Olele” has been to two world cups already and is still targeting a third one in Brazil 2014. However, many people wonder how old he will be in 2014…guess…
He’s also a “confusionist” when he concedes a goal…Mr. Kalyppo why?

23.Kevin Prince Boateng (6 Mar 1987)

Ghana has indeed given him the platform to showcase his talent and must repay this noble gesture with a lot more commitment to Ghana’s game…If you don’t know Ghanaians talk a lot oooo so Kelvin beware…again, no more tattoos…but more of the “wacko jacko” dance moves…lol

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